Stepping out of Your Default Ego-Identity with Neurosculpting

We all, to some degree, have an immediate sense of who we are – our values and beliefs, our mood and feelings, our insecurities, fears, and desires. All together, and with so much more, these form our ego – the storehouse of our identity. 

The ego is not just a bunch of abstract ideas; instead, it’s actually grounded and cemented in our body-state and mindset. While the age-old wisdom of “knowing thyself” is incredibly powerful and important, what happens when we want to actually change an aspect of who we are? 

Neurosculpting is the answer. 

But first, we must start with the ego. 

What is ego, and why does it matter?

Popular culture and pop psychology have over-generalized the ego to be boastful and self-centered, but to a degree, we need to be self-centered enough to know what we need and don’t need, and to advocate for it in the world. Your ego – your sense of self – is the container that organizes all of that. 

The Ego is merely the vehicle we use to interact with the world ~ Lisa Wimberger

In my morning meditation today I contemplated the ego as an actual physical vehicle that I have ridden around in all my life. Sometimes it is an armored car, sometimes a grand parade float, sometimes a sleek futuristic concept car… and sometimes, a Ford Escort. 

But it made me realize, the ego is mutable. It tends to get a bad rap - in spiritual communities, especially. But to interact successfully with this physical world in which our body resides, our ego is what helps organize our self referential information so we can point ourselves in the direction we want to go, and then go there. 

The Mutability of the Ego

Where the ego becomes sticky is when we don’t allow its inherent mutability to unfold. Instead, we run around as the armored car, or the parade float, all the time. 

What might happen if we designed our mental architecture such that we could easily transform our ego-vehicle for the most optimal interaction with our world?

If we aren’t able to consciously choose the state we are in – our mood, our feeling, etc. – then we’re like a marionette on a string. We are a puppet to our circumstances, buffeted by the waves of life instead of riding the waves.

For example, in my private practice, I do relational work with a lot of powerhouse women, and one of the hardest parts is learning to take the CEO hat off when it comes to romantic relationships. 

Being a boss is not typically very relational, so knowing that one needs to take the CEO hat off, and then knowing how to shift out of that identity and into partner, beloved, mother, etc, nourishes the relationship in front of you. 

This has been one of the gifts of a daily Neurosculpting® Meditation practice. The ability to access different states of embodiment at will, states that elicit different combinations of neurochemicals and neuromodulators to help me show up and relate to the world as needed, in any given moment, rather than being stuck in any one identity or way of being.

What might be possible in your relationships if you could step out of your default ego-identity?

If you have a subconscious identity around not being good at meeting new people, then you’ll feel contracted and closed off everytime you’re around new people. But if you recognize that as something you can shift out of, and you know how to access a state of being where you feel open and capable of relaxing, then you’re able to challenge the subconscious narrative and meet new people and have more data to include in your identity. 

This is what enables us to be who we want to be. 

If you’re interested in learning more about neurosculpting, please reach out to me here and let’s see if we’re a good fit: https://aralee.co/coaching